From Setback to Comeback

Things with life is - it's really moves in cycle. 

One moment everything's going your way, and the next you're hit with challenges you didn't see coming.

But the good thing is, you're never stuck.

You won't always be on top, but you also won't always be at the bottom. 

--

My career growth since graduation has been steadily upward. Sure, it wasn't always easy, but overall, it's been a pretty satisfying climb. And what makes me even prouder is that to land those jobs, I actually had to sit for exams in order to get shortlisted for interviews and somehow, I nailed them every single time. 

At one point, I truly believed that everything I had, I earned on my own. I worked for it, and it was all because of my hard work. 

Until life knocked me down so hard. There came a moment when I lost my job due to unforeseen circumstances and that setback stretched into five challenging years without work. 

Indeed, life has its own ways of humbling me and teaching me lessons I didn't know I needed. 

During that period, I learned to place my full faith and trust in Him. I understand now that He alone holds the true power and control over everything. I don't have the slightest strength, not even over the things that already in my hand. 

I had convinced myself that this one particular interview would be my last. I'd lost the spark, the hope of pursuing any more opportunities. But it became the very door I never saw coming. 

Even so, it meant starting over. From the bottom.

And who would've thought, after five years - here I am, writing this on a Friday night after work.   

Alhamdulillah, it's been over a year now since I returned to work. Back in the corporate world, rocking life as a working mom again.

But this time, I walk with a deeper sense - that this too is temporary and could be taken from me at any moment. 

Therefore, all I want to do is cherish each moment I'm given, doing my best to improve myself, day by day. 

In shaa Allah.

xoxo, 

Syuha D.

From Working Mom to SAHM: A Chapter I Never Expected

My last day as a government servant was back in December 2018.

Since then, my life has taken quite a turn. From juggling meetings and deadlines as a working mom, I found myself stepping into a role I never imagined for myself—a stay-at-home mom (SAHM). Honestly, it wasn’t something I ever thought about, let alone planned or dreamed of. Maybe for some women, especially after getting married, becoming a SAHM is part of the goal. But for me? Not at all.

Being a SAHM was never in my vocabulary. I couldn’t even picture it. Indeed, life isn’t always what one likes (Roman Holiday).

If I’m being real—I was never a great cook. Well, if I'm being brutally honest, I only learned how to make nasi goreng after I got married and yes, it was a total flop! 

We were in a LDM (long-distance marriage) for about a year plus, so thankfully that failed nasi goreng was a solo practice session. Only after we reunited, I started to cook but, it was mostly simple meals done occasionally. You wouldn't believe it took me up to 2-3 hours just to prepare dinner. By the time the food was ready, it was already supper time! 😂 So, obviously SirHubby couldn't expect me to cook 3 times a day on the weekend. He'd definitely be starving while waiting for the foods to be ready!

But once I became a full-time SAHM, a lot had to change. We had to manage our finances more carefully, which meant cooking at home became a necessity.

Slowly but surely, I adapted. Cooking time now has been cut short, and I could get it done way faster - while still keeping the same precise measurements for every cut, of course! I even baked for my kids’ birthdays—something I never imagined myself doing. But there I was, rolling dough, decorating cakes and creating moments that made their eyes light up. Over time, I found joy in it. I even started selling pastries and Mac & Cheese on a small scale—just to test the waters and explore new possibilities.

I genuinely enjoyed my time as a SAHM. Being there for my children, handling their routines, teaching them, doing homework together and cooking meals for them—it was fulfilling in ways I never expected. It made me grateful.

But I won’t lie—I never stopped looking for work.

As much as I loved being home with my kids, a part of me longed to return to the working world. I missed the rush of being in a professional setting, the mental stimulation, the feeling of productivity that came from using my skills beyond the home. That’s the only time I truly feel like my brain is functioning at full capacity.

I want to be more—for myself and for my daughters. I want to be a role model they can look up to. I want to show them what it means to chase goals, to provide for the family and to stand on your own two feet.

So I kept applying. For five years, I sent out resumes, went through interviews, faced rejections—and even experienced the heartbreak of receiving job offers only to have them fall through due to unforeseen circumstances.

Eventually, I gave up. I told myself maybe this is it. Maybe Allah wants me to focus on being the best mother and wife I can be. Maybe this chapter—unexpected as it is—is where I'm meant to serve wholeheartedly.

And maybe, just maybe, that's not a loss, but a calm sense of direction.

*****

Eris & Elysia's birthday, 2021 — cake and cupcakes by yours truly  💖

Little hands, big mess, even bigger memories 🧁

Pinky

Trivia: 

Flashback

The Year of Pink (Before Pink Was Cool)

Back in 2003, pink wasn’t the it color for teenagers—at least not where I grew up in the north. Even for babies, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Unlike today, finding anything cute and fancy in pink was like searching for a needle in a haystack. 

My parents went above and beyond to fuel my pink obsession. We combed through big malls from Kedah to Perlis just to find pink sports shoes and school bags. In the end, I scored three different pink school bags and obviously, I was beyond grateful!

And that year, I was in Form 4 and had just transferred to a standard co-ed high school from an all-girls’ school. 

Fun fact: I ended up hopping between three different schools throughout my high school years.

My reason for switching schools? I wanted to feel like a "normal" student for once. Since Standard 5, I’d been donning different colored uniforms for roles like school librarian, prefect or whatever position I held each year until Form 3. Then, I’d had enough. I wanted those last two years of high school to just be. No different colored uniforms. No extra responsibilities. Just me in a regular school uniform blending into the crowd. Well, trying to blend in, anyway. Hence at my final stop, I had one goal—to keep a low profile and enjoy being a “normal” student.

Here’s the twist: I was absolutely obsessed with pink. And when I say obsessed, I mean everything I owned was pink—stationery, sports shoes, school bag, you name it. I was a walking, talking pink explosion, head to toe.

And that's pretty much how Yat started to call me Pinky. To her—and probably everyone else—I must’ve seemed so bold for rocking pink in school. Me? I didn’t think much of it. I was just living my pink dream, blissfully unaware that it was turning heads. Typical me, being a little naïve but totally owning my vibe. 

Looking back, it’s funny to realize how that simple color made such a statement without me even trying—something I only just found out during my recent staycation with Yat. Cause it never crossed my mind that having all-pink stuff in high school back then might seem a little out of the ordinary.

And thankfully, such attention didn’t translate into making me a school prefect again! At least, I achieved my goal, though staying low-key might have been a stretch. 😁

When Pink Took a Backseat in My Wardrobe

By the end of my Degree years, I started phasing out my pink collection and exploring other colors. I shifted towards mustard and gold accessories, color-blocking styles, navy blue, army green and eventually earthy tones. Little did I realize, my wardrobe no longer had a single pink outfit. Not one. 

No kidding!

It only hit me when the girls started planning our staycation last year and suggested matching outfits in pink. I actually had to go out and buy something pink just for that reason! They couldn’t believe I didn’t already have at least one pink item in my closet. 

Well, I guess it’s just part of adulting.

As a mother of two daughters, I thought I’d pass on my pink obsession to them, but surprise, surprise, they’re not that into it. In fact, they don't have a strong attachment to any one color (yet). 

I showed a picture of my old bedroom at my parents' house and their immediate reaction was, "Wow, your room is so pink!" 😅

17-18 Dec 2023
When your kids meet the crew; Aya & Trah 😄

7-8 Dec 2024 
Girls' Staycation in Malacca
(Just Yat and I)

 

Even with only a sprinkle of pink in my life, my BFFs still stick to calling me Pinky— and honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way. 😊