Tuesday, February 14, 2012


I always hope that I could have a sister in ma life. (but it seems too late for hoping dat. mau kena ketuk ngan mama kalau minta adik lg. huhu..) =p

So anyway, I actually had a sister. Yeah, I used to have one. But it's 16 years ago.. Mama gave birth to the most adorable baby girl in the world.  And the person who's super-extremely happy, of course, Me. 

But the feelings didn't last too long.  She's only live for 12 days. I didn't even had the chance to hear her cry nor to see her smile. I only got the chance to see her when she closed her eyes for ever. But I swear to God she has the most luminous face I've ever seen. She must be prettier than me if she's still alive. =)

It's hard to believe that she's forever gone.. I keep asking why Allah s.w.t took her. Allah knows how much I want a sister then why took her from me??  Am simply can't accept the fact that she's already gone. Astaghfirullahalazim.. 

However, lots of people tried to convince me that I should be happy to be a single daughter in family where I can get Mama's jewelery without sharing, all the attention is on me, and I can have whatever I want. But that is not what am looking for. I only want a sister. I dun give a damn bout Mama's jewelery or even d attention. I just want a sister!  

Am mad cos people don't understand what I feel and what I want. And so, I rebelled. I didn't accept the presence of my youngest brother. I don't like him because I want a sister not a brother. Am mad at Mama. Am mad at people who asked me to be happy being a single daughter. Am mad at everybody. Astaghfirullahalazim.. 

Until one day, my heart open to receive its ordinance. I can't forever disregard my brothers cos in the end of the day, they all I have. They are my brothers. They will take care of me cos they are my only siblings.  And they inspiring me in so many ways..

I always look up on Abang.  He's my mentor and a benchmark to challenge myself to be good or even better than him. In study especially, I put him as a challenger. I want to get a better result just for the sake to compete with him. And yeah, at certain phase, I won! lolol

But one thing I have to admit, he's a lucky guy. His life been so easy and he's blessed! Am envy you big brother! =p

Bang Cik
My younger brother is actually a Romeo. LOL And that is why we dun really give a damn when he broke up with his girl(s). ngeee~ =p

Well, the truth is, he has a very-super-sensitive heart. Dia yg paling manja kot. Cos he never away from home for a long period. I remember when he was in the hostel, he's coming back home for every weekends! And I was like, "so what's the purpose you stay in the hostel anyway?" huhuhu.. 

But that's the good thing la.. Shows dat he really cares of my parents and home. At least, there's someone can look after them aite? Moreover, he's diligent and good in cooking =) So, kalau sy nk makan, cuma order saje.. tehehee~ 

My adik is actually smart (cuma malas). So, I can't really show that I love him. *takot nanti besar kepala bertambah. huhu.. Even though I'll scream my lungs out when teaching him doing his homework and revision but that is because I want him to get best result. I love and care about him so much. Hence, I need to be strict sometimes because I want him to put an effort to success.

The most thing I love about him is he's a very bounteous person. Bab duit mmg x pernah berkira. He'll be d first offer duet sendiri if nk guna utk apa-apa. Sebab tue beliau murah rezeki. Amin.. =)

Am so lucky and grateful to have them as my brothers. I lost one sister but I have three amazing brothers. Thank you Allah...

p/s:  Everything happens for a reason. If God brings you to it, HE will bring you through it.

In Memoriam: 
My late sister, Nur Diana Syafira. 


  1. uiks?hg penah cta lum psl 'diana'??

  2. klaw x salah, aku penah jew cter time kt hostel dlu.. klaw x salah la.. x taw la ang ingt kew x.. huhu..

  3. herm, nnti akan jumpa jugak adik kamu kan...sabar ya.. saya punya ramai adik perempuan, ambiklah kalu nak...heheheh..

  4. hmm..nk recall memory xbley ah wea..otak aq prompt "ur certain memory is corrupted"..

  5. yeah.. it's always in ma pray.. =) adik u? hehehe.. nk kew die amik sy jd kakak die? =p

  6. ae?tula masa aq bc entry nih trus aq try recall but it has prompt "ur memory is corrupted".. pe ley buwat hah?!

  7. hahaha.. xpa2 aku paham.. alorh~ bukan penting pown ang nk kne ingt.. aku pown jarang2 sgt cter.. =p